Rocking at 40 (and not in a rocking chair)

On Saturday I went to see Iron Maiden.  Yes, I like Iron Maiden.  I can't say as I'm "the" Iron Maiden fan, but I do like their music.  And let's just get the advertisement out of the way right now.  Go and buy this album:

This is Iron Maiden's Number of the Beast and it is THE album.  I can listen to this album over and over and over and over and - well, you get the idea.  Great music, great vocals, great energy.

So what's a 40-year old chick doing at a metal concert?  Rocking out, of course.  But I have to say, it was really weird.  My husband and I figured that I hadn't been to a concert in over a decade.  (We saw Pantera and Black Sabbath!)  Things have REALLY changed a lot since my last concert.

The crowd has gotten a lot older...and a lot younger.  Sure, there were some teenagers and a few young twenties (who, by the way, looked 14 carrying those beers back to their lawn spot).  But the majority of the people there were my age or older.  I know Iron Maiden is an older band, so it stands to reason that their fan base would be older.

The weird part is that a lot of the old farts brought their kids to the concert.  I saw dozens of kids between the ages of 7-12.  Now, I have a seven year old, and he likes rock music, but there is NO WAY I am going to take him to a rock concert.  I do not need to put him in with ten thousand hot, alcoholed (or drugged, or both) screaming fans that could get into a brawl at any moment.  Maybe I'm being overly cautious, but I've seen enough fights break out at concerts to know it's a regular occurence.

Maiden was great (even if they DIDN'T PLAY MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE SONG THAT EVERYONE ON THE PLANET WANTED TO HEAR....).  Yeah, these guys are "old" by today's standards, but they kicked ass.  Bruce Dickinson (lead singer) is going to be 52 next month and he was running around the stage like he was 22.  I'm sure I wouldn't have enough energy to keep up like that.  Maybe he's fueled by the music and the crowds cheering for him.

I stood there on the hill feeling slightly crabby and knew I didn't feel this way the last time I was at a concert.  We had lawn "seats."  If everyone just sat down we'd all see the stage, and we'd all be comfortable.  But no, as soon as a band is on stage, everyone has to stand up.  I don't want to stand on a hill for two hours.  It's not like I can stretch out.  It's too crowded, so I have to lean from one foot to the next.  My feet hurt.  I want to sit down, but I want to see the stage.  Why, oh why don't we all just SIT DOWN?  What's the point of all of you bringing (or renting) chairs and blankets if you aren't going to use them?

Is this what happens as you get older?  The things you found fun now start to irritate you?  The next decade is really going to suck if that's the case.

The Best Time of the Day

It's Monday, and it's just about 7:30am.  I'm currently enjoying "the best time of the day."  That's sort of a lie, because I have plenty of great times from morning until night.  But this is a really good time for me during the summer.  My husband leaves for work around 6:30.  My son is still asleep and has been sleeping later - till 8 most mornings.  This gives me 90 minutes of "me" time.

Now, that might sound a bit selfish.  I love my husband and son very much, and look forward to the moments I get to be with them.  But during this early time, the house is still dark and quiet, and I get a moment to myself to goof off, collect my thoughts, and get my act together for the day.  And honestly, they dictate this time.  It doesn't start until my husband leaves for work, and it ends when my son wakes up - which could be the same time, or it could be an hour later.  Whatever the case, I'm not taking away any of my other time during the day from them.  It's like a little gift they give me that they don't even know about.  (And I thank them for it!)

I play my silly Facebook games.  I review my emails and respond (I can concentrate when I don't have "hey Mom, hey Mom, hey Mom..." repeating at me every couple of minutes!) :)  This morning I paid the cable bill.

Exciting stuff.  But this time is great because it is so quiet, and it puts me in the mindframe for having a good day.  I know that just around the corner I've got a pile of dirty dishes to wash.  And downstairs there's laundry to do.  And I need to get things ready for the garage sale this weekend, which will be a major feat.

But now, in the early morning, I can relax.  When I was younger, the best time of the day was somewhere around 10am or 11am, and maybe sometimes 2pm.  (And in college, it was probably after my last class ended!)  But now that I don't get a chance to sleep in any more, my quality time has shifted.  And it's nice.

One Year to Go

A week after my big 4-0, my husband turned 39.  Now the countdown really begins.  At least one of us still has a foothold in the vibrant youth that is our 30s.  But a year from now?  It'll all be a faded memory of "remember whens."

Last night I said, "I need a shower."  He responds:  "Well, be careful.  You're older now.  I don't want you falling and breaking a hip."

Laugh all you want.  Your turn is coming soon!

Ignorance IS Bliss

I received an Evite (remember when people used to send cards with envelopes?) to a 40th birthday party of an old high school friend.  It was....weird.  Not the invitation, but to think that this person is going to be 40.  Let's face, in my mind, I have pictures in my head of my schoolmates.  They're all teenagers, and we're wearing cool 80s clothes, and we're doing the same, silly teenager stuff that kids do today.  In my mind, we're all still back there, in high school, dealing with teen angst and test scores.

But it's not true, and this invitation proves it.  My mind might be playing out happy little stories of 22 years ago, but reality is pushing me forward, making me accept my own age, and the age of my friends.

This is a problem.  It's one thing to grow old "alone" where your past has no connection with your present.  But when that past catches up to you - WHAMMO.  It really solidifies "40" in a way that I wasn't expecting.  I'm not the first of my high school friends to turn 40, but now that I am 40, it seems as though I'm catching on to things, and these things are affecting me more.

Acknowledging friends from the past and trying to synch them up with the present is weird.  One of my other good friends from high school and I see each other almost regularly (when our schedules permit).  On one of our first get-togethers, we reminisced about an old story from school.  We were both active participants in that story, but when we discussed it, we ended up with two different stories.  After all these years, we're not sure which one is right.

And this just goes back to that whole "happy place" in my mind.  When I'm confronted with the present, I get conflict, and age, and probably a lot of fat, baldness and wrinkles.  But in my mind, we're all happy and young, and the stories I remember are exactly how it happened.  Ahhh.....

At 1pm yesterday I found myself sitting in the school library for 90 minutes at a reading program for my son.  If you would have told a younger version of me that I would be celebrating my 40th birthday sitting in a school library, I would have laughed heartily.  But there I was.  Sitting in a quiet corner trying to squeeze in some extra work for a volunteer organization while I had the time.

I also did dishes yesterday.  Because what is the point of saying I can take the day off, and I don't have to do dishes?  The dishes I don't do today will be waiting for me tomorrow.  Only there will be twice as many.  So there isn't an "day off" from work, and dishes, and household things.

I drank a bottle of wine.  Now, normally I don't drink very often any more (due to that damn health issue I posted about).  A sip here or there, on special occasions.  But my husband said I should treat myself, and he was right.  So I treated myself to a bottle of Simi Chardonnay - probably the only California wine I like.  (I'm a fan...or I was a fan....of Australian wines, when I could drink.)  It was tasty and wonderful and everything I remembered in wine.  Especially the part where I felt like garbage at 4am because I drank entirely too much.

That is a sign of "getting older."  One drink makes you tired.  Two drinks makes you sick.

Of course, I could just lie to myself and say it was because I ate a too-big piece of cake and too much ice cream.  Yeah.  That's it.  It was the cake!

Here's the present my hubby got me:

I'm a huge Gordon Ramsey fan.  I got another book at Christmas - they're wonderful.  Great descriptions, lovely pictures.  A good cookbook is one with pictures!

Oh, and before you say "well that's not that great of a gift for a 40th birthday," don't worry.  The real gift is us getting away for a weekend to Chicago in the next few months.  (But the cookbook still rocks!)