It has been over a week since my last blog. Shame on me for that. Even though I'm really not doing this for exposure or fame or friends or whatever, I need to be more disciplined about writing. I'm doing this for me, and if I can't commit to me, I can't commit to anything.
Maybe I don't feel guilty enough when I let myself down. I would feel tremendous guilt if I needed to do this for someone else, and it didn't get done. So why don't I feel bad about not accomplishing my own goals? I mean, there's some moderate disappointment, but if I was doing this for a job, I'd feel completely horrible. No, I'd never let it get to this point.
Why can we do things for other people that we can't do for ourselves? We get work done. We motive others on their diets. We offer great advice in times of trouble. Do we have to sit in front of a mirror and talk to ourselves daily? Would we become more caring of our needs if we did so?
Monday, September 13, 2010
Friday, September 3, 2010
Volunteering, Take 2
Last year at school I volunteered for four separate projects, three of which were weekly or bi-monthly. At the end of the school year I vowed that I would need to curb my enthusiasm for trying to help with everything. I know four doesn't seem like much, but I also work, albeit from home, part time, and volunteer for a local non-profit group. Four was definitely too much.
Unfortunately I found myself at the school over the summer speaking with one of the teachers, and having her tell me how she hopes I'll come back to help because she lost an assistant. And yes, I'd like to help but it depends upon my client workload and...
Yesterday we went to the school for a "meet the teacher" event. I got a wave from the PTA President. Uh oh - there's now face recognition. :) So, my son comes home happy from the event and I come home with a few stacks of paperwork. Our school has a lot of activities and events. I can't even keep up with most of them. I already signed up at the end of last year to participate/chair/help/whatever with two of them - one monthly and one one-time. But here was this list in my packet of all the other events needing help. As I'm reading it last night I could have put my initials next to fifteen different items. Instead, I put the packet away and will look at it today with fresh mind.
I like to volunteer. First, it gets me out of the house. I don't have any local friends, so it helps to get out and communication with other adults. Second, I want to show my son a good example. He actually comes with me to my non-profit group meetings, and we joke that he's my assistant. He's more than happy to help out, and I like that. Third - help is needed. And if I have the time, why don't I help? Fourth - I learn a lot. Since I started my assortment of volunteer efforts about three years ago, I've learned how schools function, I've learned where practically every book in the library is, I've learned the socio-political struggles that go on behind the scenes of non-profit organizations, I've learned that communities aren't necessarily charitable, and that certain social groups have a strangle-hold on politics.
I've also learned that there is a small handful of people giving thousands of hours of time to make big things happen. And I like that.
I need to sit down today and decide where my efforts are going to be this year. I can't do it all. I need to take care of me, my family, my house, and my clients. But there will definitely be some breaks in between and my initials are going to be put on at least three different events...maybe four.
Unfortunately I found myself at the school over the summer speaking with one of the teachers, and having her tell me how she hopes I'll come back to help because she lost an assistant. And yes, I'd like to help but it depends upon my client workload and...
Yesterday we went to the school for a "meet the teacher" event. I got a wave from the PTA President. Uh oh - there's now face recognition. :) So, my son comes home happy from the event and I come home with a few stacks of paperwork. Our school has a lot of activities and events. I can't even keep up with most of them. I already signed up at the end of last year to participate/chair/help/whatever with two of them - one monthly and one one-time. But here was this list in my packet of all the other events needing help. As I'm reading it last night I could have put my initials next to fifteen different items. Instead, I put the packet away and will look at it today with fresh mind.
I like to volunteer. First, it gets me out of the house. I don't have any local friends, so it helps to get out and communication with other adults. Second, I want to show my son a good example. He actually comes with me to my non-profit group meetings, and we joke that he's my assistant. He's more than happy to help out, and I like that. Third - help is needed. And if I have the time, why don't I help? Fourth - I learn a lot. Since I started my assortment of volunteer efforts about three years ago, I've learned how schools function, I've learned where practically every book in the library is, I've learned the socio-political struggles that go on behind the scenes of non-profit organizations, I've learned that communities aren't necessarily charitable, and that certain social groups have a strangle-hold on politics.
I've also learned that there is a small handful of people giving thousands of hours of time to make big things happen. And I like that.
I need to sit down today and decide where my efforts are going to be this year. I can't do it all. I need to take care of me, my family, my house, and my clients. But there will definitely be some breaks in between and my initials are going to be put on at least three different events...maybe four.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
I am becoming my Mother.
It's not a bad thing to become my Mom. She's a pretty cool lady. Ingenius, resourceful and can cook circles around anyone. When I talk about how I' have difficulty doing something, she typically, quite matter-of-factly, will ask me why I'm not doing it "X" way which is, of course, the most easy, logical way to do it, and only someone who has put a little thought into it would have come to the same conclusion.
Anyway, my mom gets involved in a lot. And she volunteers A LOT. So much so that I bought her this:
http://www.catchingfireflies.com/products/stop-me-before-I...-magnet.html
(By the way, that's a GREAT price for the magnet, and no, I don't get any commission if you buy it. I just love my local stores!)
But I have that volunteering bug, too. And right now I'm being overwhelmed by it. For some reason, my mouth seems to engage and my hand goes up when I see trouble - oh, I can do it! I'll help! And then I pile up too much on my plate, and then I get stressed, and then I freak out, and then I'm the mess I see before me. (I'm working toward critical mass at the moment!)
For Mom, it seems that no matter how much she's got going on, she doesn't seem stressed. Maybe she is, and she's just really good at dealing with it - or hiding it. I don't know. I have yet to develop that ability. Maybe it happens at 45?
Anyway, my mom gets involved in a lot. And she volunteers A LOT. So much so that I bought her this:
http://www.catchingfireflies.com/products/stop-me-before-I...-magnet.html
(By the way, that's a GREAT price for the magnet, and no, I don't get any commission if you buy it. I just love my local stores!)
But I have that volunteering bug, too. And right now I'm being overwhelmed by it. For some reason, my mouth seems to engage and my hand goes up when I see trouble - oh, I can do it! I'll help! And then I pile up too much on my plate, and then I get stressed, and then I freak out, and then I'm the mess I see before me. (I'm working toward critical mass at the moment!)
For Mom, it seems that no matter how much she's got going on, she doesn't seem stressed. Maybe she is, and she's just really good at dealing with it - or hiding it. I don't know. I have yet to develop that ability. Maybe it happens at 45?
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